Me and my giraffe

So this last weekend we did a whole weekend adult riding class. 5 lessons in 3 days.
I was soo exited and had looked forward to this for 2 months.
We arrived on Friday after work and I could not believe my luck getting one of the private horses. This riding school sure has a lot of good horses and I have tried a few of them, always so happy with them!
She was suppose to be a gentle lady and I was flattered to be seen as good enough for her. And yes she needed the gentle touch. She was light on her feet, very pretty and had a good step / pace.

But her head... was in the sky all the weekend long. She looked like a giraff. My instructor was as desperate to get her head down as I was and the entire weekend was just one long fight about keeping my hands in the perfect way, to make her want to go to the bit. And with no success.
I felt I tried everything.
Normally I do not have problems getting horses to take the bit, but this lady was different.

After five hours desperately trying to get her to carry herself properly I finally had to cave in and go home deeply unsatisfied. I felt like a failure, and it seams I do not have the stomach for long lessons like these once.

I know I need the horse to carry herself correctly for her to stay healthy, but believe me, a long hack would have done this horse so much more good than five hours of me struggling on her back.
I think we both would have preferred it.

In retrospect I am not sure what I have learned...
No gallopp, no jumping, no fun stuff, just hard work with moving my hands one cm forward and backward, staying as still as I could in the saddle not to make her flinch and go all giraffe on my again.


Not sure I will go back.
I really need to get my confidence back before going there again!